Two reasons why I’m sure you will never run out of ideas: Do you know who Flannery O’Connor is? She wrote a classic called A Good Man Is Hard To Find and after I read that, she had my lifelong love and respect. Flannery O’Connor is known for saying, “Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough […]
Figure out what you don’t want to find out what you do want. “Small” is the new “big.” “Orange” is the new “black.” “40” is the new “20.” And “No” is definitely the new “Yes!” I notice that when I ask my clients what they want in their lives, 99% of the time they answer with […]
It undermines your self-confidence and is a form of self-betrayal. Enthusiastically, “I was offered the job at the local hospital that I applied for!” Lukewarm, “Oh … are you going to take it?” Dampened enthusiasm, “Yes! I’ve been hoping against hope I’d get the position.” Subtly accusing, “You didn’t tell me you wanted that job.” Awkward […]
Instead of putting off what needs to be said, try these tips … You may have been ruminating for days, weeks, months, even years — rehearsing a conversation you still haven’t been able to begin. It could be about your relationship, your career, your spiritual journey, your health, anything. You may need to face your lover, your boss, […]
There is a way to be together even when you’re far apart. There was a time in my life when I was separated from someone I loved because he had to do military duty in Iraq. We were able to text and send letters and occasionally we even spoke on the phone. But even so, inevitably […]
and what’s in it for you Have you ever been talking to someone who is looking around the room while you speak? Or who interrupts you to say something about a completely different subject? Maybe you were confiding in a friend who seemed distracted and when you accused her of not listening, she said indignantly, “I […]
Just for now, let it be all about you. I love feeling sorry for myself. What progress! I used to be someone who was so good at controlling my emotions that I didn’t even know I was doing it. The truth is, those of us who are reluctant to feel sorry for ourselves are the ones […]
You’re a writer. It comes with the territory. There’s a whole world out there, waiting to be plucked. If you’re a psychotherapist, clients fall in love with you. If you’re a goalie, you get hit by the puck. If you’re a writer, you eavesdrop. The universe is a canvas and eavesdropping is your airbrush. Write […]
Your children do not belong to you is not a lecture, but a loving reminder: You are the earthly guardian of your kids. You are not their owner. Treasure the 18 years or so that they are directly under your care, because if you pay attention, it is you who receives the gift of their innocent […]
when you feel hopelessly blocked and utterly thwarted. I am not going to torment you with a description of what you’re going through. We’ve all faced the blank page and come up with … nothing. What follows is predictable. Procrastination. Urgency to binge (pick your poison). Isolation. Lack of bathing. Despair. Cheese breath. Okay, I said I […]