I’ve been promising to write about fire energy and its relationship to anger without hostility … in other words, healthy anger. I meant to finish this piece yesterday and get it to you much earlier today, but it’s taken me two days to get my thoughts on paper. I hope it’s clear.
Yes, there is such a thing as healthy anger. Learning to use anger productively is not only empowering, it makes you a demonstration of warmth, courage and light in the world.
I’m no scientist, so please give me latitude as I use fire energy as a metaphor to discuss anger in three crucial ways:
- how to relate to anger non-judgmentally
- how to observe angry feelings in your body
- how to transform hostile anger into healthy anger
Fire energy ranges along a spectrum from warm to scalding. Physically, fire affects earth, water, and air. Emotionally, fire provides courage as fuel to be true to yourself and to the highest good for all. Fire warms you and melts you into harmonious relationship. Fire sears edges, creating respectful and protective boundaries. Fire energizes you into right action.
In this world, a personality lacking fire cannot be true to herself or others. For example, without fire energy, Jesus could not have rebuffed Satan during his 40 days in the desert.
If you reframe anger as fire energy, you remove judgment about anger as a bad emotion. Think about it. Fire simmers, steams, sears, scalds and stokes, but that doesn’t leave us feeling morally outraged or spiritually bankrupt.
Relate to anger as a form of heat, and you can learn to appreciate it and use it well. When Jesus said in A Course in Miracles, “Anger is never justified,” he was referring to anger as a tool for attack. However, when you give your anger to the Holy Spirit, it is used spiritually, to implement good and activate miracles.
Fire exists on a spectrum from lukewarm to volcanic eruptions. Fire can be beautiful or destructive, life-saving or a deathtrap … and very practical for all the degrees in-between.
We need lukewarm milk to nurture an infant, boiled water for antiseptic purposes, the cauterizing property of fire to close wounds, stop bleeding and prevent infection.
Who doesn’t love the warm crackle of a fireplace or the beauty and thrill of fireworks? What is dangerous in one situation is celebratory in another. The degree of “healthy” heat depends on the circumstances at hand.
The thing about fire is … it can burn but it doesn’t get angry.
Fire is a chemical reaction. Fire energy aka healthy anger is an alchemical process — it is spiritually-infused.
Noticing Anger in Your Body
Many of us have gotten so good at repressing our anger, that we no longer recognize it within us. You cannot access your anger for productive purposes unless you familiarize yourself with how it feels. Anger can spark quickly, or simmer slowly.
To really get something out of this exploration, email me descriptions of the physical sensations you have when you’re feeling angry. Do you feel pin-pricks under your armpits? Do you break into a sweat? Do you feel a commotion in your solar plexus that rises into your chest and throat?
If you are more scared than angry, you need to gather inner kindling. Crying when you’re angry just dampens your inner fire. Fire gives you conviction and courage. Healthy anger gives you the strength to be willing to die for what you know is right. You probably won’t have to put your life on the line, but it’s the best feeling in the world to know you would. And it’s the worst feeling to know you wouldn’t.
You can recognize the difference between harmful anger and healthy anger because healthy anger combusts into loving spiritual action. Healthy anger clarifies why you’re here and gives you a sense of purpose. The essence of that purpose is always to be a shining beacon of love … although that very well may not look the way you thought it would.
Transforming Hostile Anger Into Healthy Anger
Healthy anger is a form of self-discovery. If you are hot-headed, you need to learn to process your inner fire through honest acknowledgment of your feelings. I’d call that an ego intervention 🙂 Then anger doesn’t build up and blindside you. Instead, it self-regulates and you have the space to choose Spiritual Guidance. You learn to recognize what anger feels like, how to access anger, and how to process and self-regulate fiery feelings rather than holding them in until you either implode or explode.
As Mooji says, “Step into the fire of self-discovery. This fire will not burn you, it will only burn what you are not.”
Healthy anger is the transmutation of an internal fire into fuel for a loving purpose. The fire energy of healthy anger rises to the heart and gives you courage; it clears the head and gives you clarity. Healthy anger motivates: it gets your feet walking, your hands building, your mouth speaking and your heart loving. Fire sparks both creative ideas and loving action!
People who lack fire energy are deeply disappointed in themselves. They feel limp and spineless, and tend to be horribly self-critical. They feel cowardly, frightened and held hostage by the ego. I know from experience. It’s a terrible feeling to hide when you know you should step up.
Without fire (healthy anger), your heart quivers, your head may be foggy, and you don’t even know what you believe, or who you are. Your energetic system is soggy without fire energy. You need some snap, crackle and pop to stand up for yourself, be taken seriously and respected in your relationships.
Healthy anger lacks hostility. It is not aimed against another; it is a clear knowing that something must be said or done. Healthy anger is about action, be it self-care, meditating, telling the truth in personal relationships, protecting the vulnerable, or social activism.
Email me ([email protected]) and tell me your intuitive feeling about where your healthy anger is meant to be channeled.