The Surly Woman at the Deli Counter

Someone just told me a story of going into his local supermarket to get some fresh cold cuts. He went to the deli counter, where there were two women serving customers. One of them was not making eye contact, and generally conveyed a surly attitude. The other was smiling at customers and giving them samples to taste before buying.

When his turn came, the surly woman asked for his order. He requested roast beef and swiss cheese. She took a very long time. She did not offer him any tastes. She did not smile at him. He could hear customers chuckling with the cheerful server as he waited, with some irritation, for his food. After a long time, she handed him his order. He checked and saw she had given him pastrami (not roast beef) and mozzarella (not swiss).

This is not a story about forgiveness, or how you create your own reality. It is not about saving and uplifting the surly server. It is about keeping your finger on your own emotional pulse and acknowledging your resentment. The best thing you can do for someone else is be true to yourself. Pretending you are not resentful when you are does no one any good. Minimizing your resentment because the situation seems minor simply perpetuates your self-betrayal and dishonesty.

Accessing your fire energy ensures you stay centered and loyal to yourself. The most mundane interactions are a great practice ground. If this young man had access to his fire energy, when the surly woman approached him, he could have said, “That’s okay, I’m not ready yet.” Then he could have waited until the cheerful server was free and given her his order. He admitted to me that this never occurred to him. And even if it had, he said he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

Why not?

Inhibition. Guilt. Self-consciousness. An inner edict to be “nice,” not rock the boat, get with the program, etc.

What if the surly server had been insulted? What if she got into trouble? … What he did not consider was, what if she was relieved to have a break? What if she was motivated to reflect on her surly attitude? These are all future possibilities. We don’t know — and it’s better not to go there because they are a way of allowing your ego to dominate your life. But what you do have the potential to know is how you feel in any given moment, and how to honor that feeling in a way that is respectful and kind to yourself and others.

A healthy relationship with anger is one of the most efficient routes to spiritual awakening. Want a taste?

Join me this Friday, Feb 16th in a live online workshop:

Fire Energy & Forgiveness: The Road to Freedom

3 pm Pacific and 6 pm Eastern – 90 minutes or so
(Here’s a time converter for everyone in other time zones)

You will feel empowered as you discover fire energy and forgiveness can work hand-in-hand.

Let’s put into practice the empowering principles I’ve been sharing with you. Join me in an interactive online workshop on Friday, Feb 16th at 3 pm Pacific/6 pm Eastern in my Zoom room. Fee: a mere $25 for a potentially life-changing internal reconfiguration 🙂

A workshop is interactive. It’s an experience — not a lecture. You don’t sit and take notes. You show up willing to work. I need some of you to be brave enough to work with me in front of the group. Everyone will benefit from your work, so it is not just for you, but for all of us. Three people have volunteered so far. Those of you who do not volunteer can still do the exercises, experiments and practices in private … and offer energetic support 🙂

If the workshop is a hit, we’ll continue weekly workshops to delve deeply and thoroughly into helping you process your feelings, and turn them into productive expressions of your True Self.

The workshop is tentatively called Fire Energy & Forgiveness: Your Road to Freedom. It includes working with anger without hostility, fair fighting, and other elements that are interrelated. Let’s transform your inner world, and see what the world reflects back to you 🙂

Any questions? Email [email protected]

100% Money Back Guarantee (for 24 hours after the completion of the workshop)